March 23, 2008

I want to talk about the campaign.

Not me. I'm off today.

Oh, c'mon. We never talk politics.

Alright, shoot.

Remember the whole likeability issue? God, what a distraction. Performing likeability just wasn't your forte.

All I did was change my hairstyle. I stayed on message.

Not as convincingly. The no-nonsense, I'm-not-trying-to-please Hillary is much more persuasive and she went into hiding for a while. Actually I think that was your biggest mistake.

You're kidding me. No way.

It just took up so much space and went on and on. Tell me, how much of your decision was based on internalizing some of the Hillary vitriol? I mean how much did you actually buy into the idea that you weren't likable enough?

I didn't buy into it at all.

You must have a little.

I don't want to talk about it right now.

Alright, alright.


Let's talk about race then.

Oh God. It's Easter Sunday. Can't I have a break for Christ's sake?

Why did you let the media get away with it? Why didn't you jump in there?

Look, I only have so much control over perception and it's a very loaded issue. What was I supposed to do?

Well, first, you could have countered the imagined racial undertone of Bill's "fairy tale" comment.

That came from Obama's camp, not the media.

I know but

Obama's absence on the Iraq decision hadn't been highlighted before. You know a lot of young people thought he was in the Senate and voted against the Iraq war.

Actually of lot of older people thought that and probably still do. Why didn't you elaborate on his absence and clarify that it had nothing to do with race?

Well plenty of people did. I didn't have to.

I disagree. All I heard was the racial spin and not a thing about what Bill actually said. Basically you let the media paint you and your husband as racists and whitewash the best card you had, namely Obama's silence on Iraq. That was your second biggest mistake.

Ok, enough.

No, don't leave. Wait. One more thing. This is happening now. They are already calling a potential Hillary win a Pyrrhic victory. They keep talking about the "will of the people." You need to hammer home the simple fact that if the super delegates side with him, they are siding against the will of 12,400,000 voters. The difference in the popular vote is less than 2%. It's not a mandate for him and neither for you. There's no clear "will of the people". We're split!

Are you finished yet?


Good, because I'm tired and I want my chocolate bunny. #